How To Be Relaxed And Confident In Any Situation Of Your Life?

When I was a teenage boy, I was afraid of everyone and everything. If I wanted to go and talk to any girl, I would sweat. If I needed to talk to some stranger, I would be afraid like hell. As time went by and I grew up and also lost my loved ones, I realized there’s nothing to be afraid of in life. You must remain calm and do everything confidently, because in this world whether it’s you or I or any other individual, a girl or woman or man or millionaire or billionaire or a celebrity, we are all here on this earth as travelers and passengers, trying to make our respective journeys. 

And we all eat and pardon my language, shit in the same way too. The only difference between us humans is in the way each individual thinks. It’s the thinking, the thoughts of each individual that separate us from each other and make us unique and of course, our facial and physical appearances. So, there is nothing or nobody to be afraid of, as long as you’re not hurting anyone in any way. Do everything in your life confidently like you are the king or the queen of your life, which you are actually, in case you’ve not realized it yet.

Here are some tense situations of life, and how you can remain calm and be confident in these situations:

Situation 1: At an interview:

Many people get nervous when it comes to interviews and it’s a normal human nature or tendency. You need that job badly, so, you begin to worry about a multitude of things, “Will I get the job? Will I be hired? What if I don’t get hired? Oh God, I need this job badly!” Your mind goes for an unnecessary ride on an anxiety-paved road to the Nervous land. But hey, just stop right there for a minute and relax. Breathe in and breath out slowly for 20-30 seconds. It’s okay, go ahead, don’t worry about if anyone’s watching you do it, you’re not trying to steal or rob or kill anyone, you’re just trying to breathe. 

Before going for the interview, just know this thing, whoever that interviewer is going to be, he/she is just as human as you are. He/she probably has more knowledge about the workplace, job-related operations, and people working at the place, but he or she is just as eating-and-shitting human as you are. Once again, pardon my language, but that’s just the way it is. 

If you’ve prepared well for that job and have all the necessary skills needed for it, just relax and have faith in yourself. Before going for the interview, always groom yourself. Make sure your nails are trimmed if you are a guy and polished if you are a girl or woman. Make sure your hair is nicely set or combed. Make sure your clothes are neat and clean, and your shoes are polished or scrubbed. 

And when you know, you’re looking pleasant and decent, it doesn’t matter what color your skin tone is or how tall or short you are, or how your face looks, what matters is that you’re well-groomed. Take a look at yourself in the mirror and talk to yourself for a few minutes. Tell yourself that you’re looking good and you have all the skills needed for this job and that you are well-prepared for this interview. And then simply go and sit before that interviewer when you’re called in for the interview. Give all answers impromptu in an assertive but respectful tone of voice. Be honest about your situation and how this job is going to help you and how you’re going to be an asset to that company if you’re hired. 

And even if you get rejected, it’s not the last job on planet earth. You can try at some other company. Of course, just do some self-analysis about what that area was that you lacked in and try to improve in that area. Always be consistent in self-improvement. And always stay well-groomed. When you’re well-groomed and always in the process of improving yourself in terms of skill set, you’ll automatically be confident and relaxed every day, and of course at any interview too.

Situation 2: When talking to the girl or boy you like and want to have a romantic relationship with:

If you like some girl if you’re a guy or some boy if you’re a girl and you’ve been consistently in contact with each other at the workplace or college place or in the neighborhood, but you always hesitate to talk to her/him because you’re afraid, ‘What if I get rebuffed?’ So, again, do the same thing, inhale and exhale slowly for 20-30 seconds, and then think of that person as the same eating-and-shitting human as you are, and you like him/her a lot because we humans are meant to fall in love with each other, and sometimes it’s romantic love.

And also remember, we’re all just passengers making our journeys on earth which will end someday or other, but now is your moment. It’s “right now” that matters the most. 

So, instead of having regrets later on in life for not expressing your feelings to that person you like or feel so deeply about, why not simply talk and express your feelings now? And even if you get rejected or ridiculed, it doesn’t matter. As long as your words and actions are not hurtful toward that person in any way, go ahead and talk to that person.

Be honest about your feelings and express your heart freely. And if the outcome is yes, then you’re on a roll. If it is no, then you still have that satisfaction in your heart that you expressed yourself freely, confidently, and honestly to that person. There is no need to be sad about that, you can’t make the other person feel about you the same as you feel about him/her. It’s that individual’s choice, you don’t have to coerce or force it upon that person. 

One more thing, never become friends with that person by keeping hidden hope in your heart that someday he/she will accept or realize your love or feelings for him/her. If he/she wants to continue to see you or talk to you, then you always be straightforward in letting that person know that you don’t just want to be friends with him/her, you also have romantic feelings for him/her, and it’s always going to be that way even when that person sees you just as a friend. Always keep on expressing your feelings to that person from time to time if that person continues a friendly relationship with you.

Situation 3: When you’ve lost your dear or loved one:

Such is life. As I mentioned before, we are all humans and we are all here for some given time, and death is the ultimate destination of our respective journeys. I think this journey of life begins with a round-trip ticket. Every one of us, one day will have to return to our Maker, to God, where we started this journey of life from. 

I totally understand the piercing pain of losing your loved one. It’s like you see them by your side one moment, you can touch them and laugh and smile with them, but the next moment, it’s all gone. It’s unbearable and it can rend your confidence to pieces, and I perfectly understand it. 

But you gotta find some strong purpose for your existence on this earth. It could be your passion for music, writing, acting, painting, YouTubing, blogging, cooking, business, or anything else. Just dedicate all your time and energy to getting better at your passion, just try to hone it every day every hour. 

And then when you’ve achieved something great out of it, share your experience with others who may need your help and guidance in coping with the pain of the loss of their loved ones. Live your life to your full potential. You may think, “Hey Satish! This is easier said than done!” I totally understand it because I’ve seen and experienced it myself, and I still feel that sadness sometimes, but I try to focus on my passions.

I firmly believe your lost loved ones are always looking at you smiling from wherever they are. I believe the bond of love has no death or end. Even when you lose your loved ones, they continue to breathe with you through their love for you. And when they see you living to your full potential from wherever they are as free souls, they are definitely going to be proud of you. So, remember their love and be confident through their never-ending love for you.

Situation 4: You try but you fail again and again:

See, it’s perfectly human to fail and it’s perfectly okay to fail again and again in the pursuit of your dreams and goals. But the important thing is that you learn from your failures and then improve in that area and try again. Keep on trying again and again. When you’re failing and learning and improving and trying again, I’m pretty damn certain that success is already yours, and it’s only a matter of time before everyone else sees that too.

Read books to build your confidence. You can read all kinds of books, self-help, fiction, non-fiction, autobiographies, etc. From every book, you’ll learn something, and it’ll make you a better thinker and a calmer and more confident individual, and as they say, ‘Knowledge is true power.’

Situation 5: When someone tries to belittle you:

Like I’ve mentioned earlier, every one of us is a traveler on this earth, nobody is going to be here forever and you’re as good or bad as anyone else. But being bad or hateful is only going to rob you of your peace. So, continue to be a good person as you are. Always stand up for yourself. Never give anyone the power to belittle you in any way. 

You know yourself better than anyone else in the world. So, love yourself, don’t hurt anyone because they have hurt you. Just go your way, focus on your things, and keep getting better at yourself with each day passing. You know your worth, so don’t even bother yourself with others and make yourself a low confident person because of them. Just steer clear of such people if you can or simply ignore them if you can’t steer clear of them for some reason.

They have done nothing worthwhile in their own lives, so they look at you through their same little eyes. Always talk to yourself and remind yourself of your worth and passion, because that’s what you are, a confident, passionate heart with a purpose in your life.

In conclusion, as I mentioned before, always stay groomed, talk to yourself by looking in the mirror daily or just talk to yourself while walking, sitting, or even shitting. Read as much as you can, and always be honest to yourself in everything that you do in life. When these basic things are always in place, you’ll be confident for the rest of your life, no matter what happens.

Of course, you can’t always be confident in life. But remember, every situation in your life, be it happy or tense or sad, is temporary and will pass with time. So, there’s no sense in fretting over it even if that situation is tense or bad. Acknowledge every situation you are in no matter how messed up it is. Just remain calm, because losing calmness is not going to make it any better. But by being calm even in such a situation, you’ll be able to maintain your confidence to a decent degree.

Also, please check out my article, How to Deal with Life When Everything Seems Chaotic, where I talk extensively about some chaotic situations of life, and how to tackle them.

Power to your heart, power to your soul!

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